Why You Should Take Care of You, Too

I know a lot of women who want to serve their families well. So they work and cook and carpool and clean and generally do all that is required of a “good” wife and mom, day in and day out.

Then at some critical point, they run themselves down and just keep right on going—because they feel selfish for needing a break. Or worse, they think it means they’ve somehow failed.

Uh. Hold on a sec.

Let’s redefine what it means to serve a family well.

Yes, we are to be humble, generous, and ready to sacrifice for our loved ones—which Scripture says is an expectation for all believers, meaning both Mom and Dad.

“And do not forget to do good and to share with others, for with such sacrifices God is pleased.” (Hebrews 13:16)

But caring for others and putting their interests first doesn’t necessarily mean neglecting our own health and well-being. In fact, it could mean just the opposite.

Think about it. When you’re exhausted, drained, and frazzled, what kind of attitude do you typically display toward your family? Many of us get cranky when we get stretched too thin. And that crankiness leads to snappish behavior toward the people we love best. That is not a pretty picture of humble servanthood.

“And the Lord's servant must not be quarrelsome but must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful.” (2 Timothy 2:24)

Yikes.

So in order to love and serve our families well, we need to care for our own needs well enough to prevent the burnout that leads to crankiness, resentment, and eroded relationships.

Makes sense, right? But HOW?

Well, the solution might look different for each of us. Find something that either relaxes you or energizes you and fills your soul tank. Then schedule time to do it.

Maybe that looks like a quiet bath (alone!), an hour of reading, or a loud night out with girlfriends. Get your husband or a good friend on board to cover for the kids while you enjoy your “me” time. Reciprocal plans work best, for example, you get Monday night at the coffee shop and your hubby gets Saturday morning for golf. When both parents have a chance to refuel, chances are everybody will get along better—and serve one another in love the way God intended.

So however you choose to take care of yourself, remember—self-care is not selfish. It’s a necessary component in caring well for others.

Blessings,
Becky Kopitzke
Join me for more mom-to-mom encouragement at BeckyKopitzke.com