Adoption Day {And 13 Questions to Ask about Adoption}
Today is adoption day in the Goyer house! Did you hear those whoops and hollers? Yes, I thought so!
I will be sharing photos over on my private blog (www.TriciaGoyer.com) tomorrow, January 12th, about our newly adopted kids . . . but for those of you who don't know about it, I'll share a little of our latest adoption journey.
Before our newest adoption John and I had six children. Three of them are biological, and three are adopted. Six kids?! You may be wondering why we felt it necessary to adopt again.
The idea started with my husband. “You know,” he told me one morning after prayer, “I'm feeling like we're a little too comfortable, and God hasn't called us to comfort in this life. I think we should adopt again.”
I wasn't surprised by his comment, and he wasn't surprised by my response, which was, “Yes! Let's!”
You see every day I pray for waiting kids. Living in Arkansas, I'm always looking at photos at our state's Heart Gallery called The Project Zero. Their goal is to connect adoptive families with waiting kids so there will be ZERO waiting kids from foster care. (These are kids whose parents' rights have already been terminated.) As I look at the photos I pray God will bring homes for these children. And for four of them He did . . . our home.
Once John and I knew God was calling us again, it was time to update all our paperwork. We adopted from foster care previously, but there was still a lot of work to update our file.
We also started praying in earnest. Lord, who do you have for us?
We felt called to adopt a sibling group, since they are often hard to place. We were drawn to older kids because most people want to adopt younger kids. As we prayed we also had another word that stirred out hearts: girls.
Working with teen moms I've mentored many young women who aged out of foster care. At 18 years old they leave the state system and usually don't have anywhere to go. They often find themselves moving in with boyfriends, and then they are soon pregnant.
What if someone had stepped in and gave them a home and family first? I often wondered.
I told Christie from The Project Zero what we felt God was calling us to: an older sibling group of girls. Only a few weeks later she let us know there were four girls open for adoption, ages 14, 11, 11, and 9. Even before we were shown a picture, my heart was drawn to them. Even before I heard their story, I hurt for them. I clearly remember standing in church during worship and weeping. Lord, if it is your will, make them ours.
About four months after that prayer John and I met them. Another month after that they started visiting our home. Last June they moved in, and TODAY the adoption will be finalized!
Yes, God had planned for them to be our girls, and I wasn't the only one praying. On the day we met them, the oldest one smiled at us with big brown eyes. “I've been praying for a family, and I'm so thankful for you. I have a good feeling about this.”
By the end of the day we'll officially have four more Goyers in our family! We couldn't be happier.
What about you? Have you ever thought about adoption? If so, here are some questions to ask. Take time to write down your answers and PRAY. Ask God to show you His heart.
Questions:
- Why do I feel called to adopt?
- Is my spouse on board? (What are his concerns?)
- Can I handle the extra commitment? (Usually we don't think we can, but God provides!)
- What are my biggest concerns about raising a child who is not biologically mine?
- Who can I talk to about adoption?
- What age of child do I want?
- Are we open to a different race or special needs?
- Are we most interested in domestic, international or adoption from foster care?
- How much can we afford or are willing to fundraise? (In most cases adopting from foster care is free.)
- What do our family members think about adoption? (Especially our kids.)
- Do I have a good support network in place when (not if) problems arise?
- If we can't adopt how can we help adoptive parents?
- Finally, what does the Bible say about adoption?
In God's Word He tells us to care for the orphans and the widows. There are reasons why some families can't adopt, but every family can do something to support adoptive families . . . especially pray!
Won't you pray for our family today? We are celebrating, but we know challenges are still to come, as with any family. We are willing for face the challenges though. These children are worth it. They are worth giving our time, family, home, and love. There are four new Goyer girls who will agree!
Blessings,
Tricia
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